So I don’t need to tell you how crazy road trips can be with four kids. We are talking two girls ( ages 13 and 7) and two boys (ages 9 and 8). Crazy. Thank God for whoever invented Minecraft. I know it has lost its luster in the gaming world, but there was a time when Minecraft was king. That video game- as silly and as pointless as it is- provided an hour or two or maybe more of some parental peace and quiet. Maybe. It really depends on when which boy wants to start some mess. He might want to destroy one of his sisters’ newly constructed Minecraft mansions (also know as arson and major vandalism). Or maybe he just wanted to break in and steal something in their house (also known as breaking and entering). Or maybe he just goes savage and just kills one of them, then takes all their treasures and equipment (also known as first degree murder, theft and larceny) . That last one can create ultimate chaos.
“Mom! Stouten! Tell them to stop!”
“Stop doing what?”
“They are killing me and stealing all my stuff!”
“No I’m not!”
“Yes you are!”
“Well it’s part of the game!”
“Not on creative mode!”
You know the drill. But before this climactic scene, there was a nice, peaceful driving period on this road trip. It was really wonderful. Brief. But still wonderful. Which is why I can’t be mad at Minecraft even though it promotes criminal behavior. It occupied a lot of my kids’ free time and provided some solace as they quietly played. It’s not Minecraft’s fault that boys can be destructive hellions. I should be mad at myself for shoving technology, phones, and video games down their willing throats just to get some semblance of peaceful adulting. But when you are driving for 14 hours is that really so wrong? I don’t think so.
Well we can debate on our parental mistakes and choices, but I think we can all agree that we enjoy these family trips. Despite what I complained about in the previous paragraph, there were many great moments in the car. And countless moments from all the vacations. Through all the “are we there yets” and the 243 pee breaks, these trips easily become priceless memories. Maybe they aren’t so fun at times, but we always reminisce later about how much fun we had.
When I was in college and the following years, I took many road trips. There are various portions of those trips that I don’t remember, but what I do recall, I thought those times could never be topped. Cancun, South Padre Island, Pittsburg, Bahamas, Daytona, Rose Bowl- those are just trips off the top of my head that I thought were the greatest trips ever. But I can honestly say that my family excursions were great also. A different fun, a different cast of characters, but still high on the list. And I’m not just saying that to look like a great Dad.
So the next question is: “why are the family trips just as fun?” I mean, I’m definitely not drinking and partying during the family trips as much as I did on those trips when I was young. I’m not going to parties and clubs. I’m not dancing and flirting. I’m responsible for many human beings instead of just myself. So why are family trips so high on the fun list?
My first answer would probably have to be because I get to watch my kids have so much fun. Witnessing the pure joy in my kids’ eyes traveling to new places, doing new fun things, and never wanting it to end is so priceless. Watching them smile all week and never wanting to sleep is worth all the drinks and dances I’m missing. That’s when we as parents take that next step to Olympic status: when we put our kids happiness before our own.
The nostalgic memories we create are another answer. I can remember like yesterday the trips that my parents took me on as a kid. Over 30-40 years ago, I still look back at those trips and smile. I feel as though my kids will do the same smiling. Even recently they bring up how fun our annual trip to Cedar Point (a really cool amusement park in Northern Ohio) was, and how they looked forward to it every year. There’s other larger trips that they fondly talk about. These trips shaped them as kids, and gave them an escape from the humdrum, everyday life for a minute. Maybe they are already pretty happy with life, but now mom and/or dad are taking them to Disney World??? Now they are in the best family ever!! And they will never forget it. And neither will we as parents. We found the means to take this trip, provide it to our kids, and make a memory that will last a lifetime. Just like my childhood memories did.
This trip to the Poconos- even though I don’t know it yet- will be THE trip we will never forget. It will change all six of our lives forever. There will be a huge secret we will have to share, and live our daily lives with it. And because there are those who will know our secret, living our daily lives will be a trip.
“Are we there yet?”
“Almost there.”